1. Vitamins
Just shoot us now, why don’t you.
Vitamins, yes vitamins of all things, can
destroy your health: A and E in particular
have been linked in numerous studies to
increased mortality (from cancer, heart
failure, etc.). The reason? Their high
levels of antioxidants—which, WTF,
have always been hailed as the holy grail
of health—weakens your immune
system.
2. Yoga
Torn tendons and cartilage. Destroyed
hips. Arthritis. Retinal tears! Back and
neck trauma! Blood clots!! Permanent
nerve injury!!! Brain
damage!!! STROKE!!! Turns out all that
downward-dogging might be more of an
extreme sport than a Zen-inducing soul
massage. Thanks to all that exaggerated
bending and contorting, the number of
yoga-related emergency room admissions
more than doubled from 2001 to 2002.
We’re not saying stop namaste-ing, but
tread carefully…
3. Neti Pot
Touted by the likes of Oprah, Dr. Oz, and
Molly Sims, this holistic nasal cleanser
seems like a quaint, harmless home
remedy to clear up allergies, colds, and
congestion. Until, that is, it turns around
and gives you a freaking deadly brain
infection! Several people in Louisiana
died after flushing out their nose using
tap water containing a fatal amoeba.
(Curse you, Naegleria fowleri!) According
to the FDA, use bottled water or boil H2O
and let it cool before a nasal douche—or,
what the hell, just pass the Claritin.
4. Brown Rice
Carbs are bad, wheat makes you fat,
potatoes are empty calories, etc. But the
one starch we still have on our side is
brown rice, right? … Right? Not so much.
A Consumer Reports investigation tested
hundreds of different brands of rice and
discovered measurable amounts of
arsenic in all of them. Rice eaters had
arsenic levels that were 44 percent
greater than people who don’t get their
rice on—and what’s more, the “good for
you” brown kind had significantly
higher levels of the toxin than the white
variety. So, make quinoa your new BFF,
okay?
5. Grilled Food
It’s BBQ season—
which supposedly makes healthy eating
faster and easier than ever. You can just
throw sliced veggies, a chicken breast,
even fruit on the grill, and voila! Uh,
yeah, about that… Hate to break it to you,
but charred food can, surprise surprise,
give you cancer. You know those
blackened bits? They indicate the
presence of the carcinogen HCA, which
can damage your DNA and kickstart the
big C. You don’t have to ban barbecue
outright, but minimize HCA by cooking
at lower temps, removing the skin from
chicken or salmon, and using smaller
pieces of meat so it’ll be done faster.
6. Spray-on Sunscreen
Don’t get us wrong—we worship
sunscreen for its amazing ability to stave
off skin cancer…but not all types are
created equal. Sunscreen sprays are crazy
popular (makes sense: they’re convenient
and easy to apply, they coat your skin
evenly), but they might not be the safest
bet. The FDA is currently investigating
some potentially dangerous side-effects
of spritzing on your SPF. There’s a
concern that not enough of it actually
gets on your skin, and that you’ll inhale
the chemical-filled product as you mist it
on—and now we can’t even use a neti
pot to get that crap out.
Just shoot us now, why don’t you.
Vitamins, yes vitamins of all things, can
destroy your health: A and E in particular
have been linked in numerous studies to
increased mortality (from cancer, heart
failure, etc.). The reason? Their high
levels of antioxidants—which, WTF,
have always been hailed as the holy grail
of health—weakens your immune
system.
2. Yoga
Torn tendons and cartilage. Destroyed
hips. Arthritis. Retinal tears! Back and
neck trauma! Blood clots!! Permanent
nerve injury!!! Brain
damage!!! STROKE!!! Turns out all that
downward-dogging might be more of an
extreme sport than a Zen-inducing soul
massage. Thanks to all that exaggerated
bending and contorting, the number of
yoga-related emergency room admissions
more than doubled from 2001 to 2002.
We’re not saying stop namaste-ing, but
tread carefully…
3. Neti Pot
Touted by the likes of Oprah, Dr. Oz, and
Molly Sims, this holistic nasal cleanser
seems like a quaint, harmless home
remedy to clear up allergies, colds, and
congestion. Until, that is, it turns around
and gives you a freaking deadly brain
infection! Several people in Louisiana
died after flushing out their nose using
tap water containing a fatal amoeba.
(Curse you, Naegleria fowleri!) According
to the FDA, use bottled water or boil H2O
and let it cool before a nasal douche—or,
what the hell, just pass the Claritin.
4. Brown Rice
Carbs are bad, wheat makes you fat,
potatoes are empty calories, etc. But the
one starch we still have on our side is
brown rice, right? … Right? Not so much.
A Consumer Reports investigation tested
hundreds of different brands of rice and
discovered measurable amounts of
arsenic in all of them. Rice eaters had
arsenic levels that were 44 percent
greater than people who don’t get their
rice on—and what’s more, the “good for
you” brown kind had significantly
higher levels of the toxin than the white
variety. So, make quinoa your new BFF,
okay?
5. Grilled Food
It’s BBQ season—
which supposedly makes healthy eating
faster and easier than ever. You can just
throw sliced veggies, a chicken breast,
even fruit on the grill, and voila! Uh,
yeah, about that… Hate to break it to you,
but charred food can, surprise surprise,
give you cancer. You know those
blackened bits? They indicate the
presence of the carcinogen HCA, which
can damage your DNA and kickstart the
big C. You don’t have to ban barbecue
outright, but minimize HCA by cooking
at lower temps, removing the skin from
chicken or salmon, and using smaller
pieces of meat so it’ll be done faster.
6. Spray-on Sunscreen
Don’t get us wrong—we worship
sunscreen for its amazing ability to stave
off skin cancer…but not all types are
created equal. Sunscreen sprays are crazy
popular (makes sense: they’re convenient
and easy to apply, they coat your skin
evenly), but they might not be the safest
bet. The FDA is currently investigating
some potentially dangerous side-effects
of spritzing on your SPF. There’s a
concern that not enough of it actually
gets on your skin, and that you’ll inhale
the chemical-filled product as you mist it
on—and now we can’t even use a neti
pot to get that crap out.
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