I have never found myself in a state of
utter helplessness before in my adult
life. I have always been the stronger one
in our marriage and my husband always
left the decision making on issues to me.
Without prejudice, I always handled my
issues well but this present issue is too
much for me to handle.
My 16-year-old son has beaten more than
he could chew and you know the way it is
in the African set up; a good child is the
father’s, while the bad one belongs to the
mother. It has now become an issue of
“sort out the mess your son created”. This
for the past few weeks had been my
husband’s slogan, but when he came out
with distinction in his Senior Secondary
School Certificate Examinations (SSCE), he
was his proud father.
I really cannot say what pushed my son
into this, because I have always been
careful with all of them. I have four
children; three girls and a boy, who
happens to be our last child. He came as
an afterthought which explains why his
immediate elder sister is a lot older than
him; she is 23.
While the girls are away in school, he was
always home and got all the attention he
needed. Like the tradition in our family, he
had to stay in the boarding school in his
final year and that was the only time he left
the house and it was good for him because
he made all his papers.
When he left for school and I was left
alone at home, I asked one of my church
members, a widow who needed assistance
with her children’s education to allow one
of her girls to live with me. She gladly did, I
enrolled her in school, and took care of her
like my own child.
When my son returned home after his
examinations, they both relate like brother
and sister, and I personally do not see a
reason I shouldn’t let them play together.
Despite the fact that Grace, the little girl
who is 14 told me that her mother had
already spoken with her on sex education, I
made it a point of duty to do the same with
her. I didn’t bring her into my household
to treat her like an outsider, I took her as
my own daughter and I am really pleased
that she is well behaved.
Few weeks ago, I noticed that Grace was
looking very pale; I asked if she was ill and
she said she was feeling a little feverish. I
then took her to the hospital and it was
then that we were told she was six weeks
pregnant. I was shocked because she
doesn’t leave the house and she was
always with me. I kept my cool until we got
home; I couldn’t have done otherwise
because as soon as she heard the result of
her test, she started crying so hard that I
was scared.
As soon as we arrived home, she told me
my son was responsible. I was shocked. I
couldn’t ask him immediately as he was
away to his father’s office. When he came
in later and I asked him, he didn’t deny. I
didn’t know what I was expecting but his
confession shocked me to my bone marrow.
When I succeeded in calming Grace down, I
assured her that I would take care of the
situation, but sincerely I didn’t know how I
would handle it.
When my husband came, I told him all that
happened; his response shocked me. He
told me to handle it and clean my son’s
mess. I am still at a loss for a solution. I
did not take Grace from her mother to
truncate her education. I also do not have
the heart to send her back to her mother or
get her to have an abortion like people
have suggested. What if she is my
daughter? How would I tell her mother
what happened?
As for my son, I would treat him the way he
should be treated after sorting Grace out.
Please, Taiwo help me as I am really
confused and at a loss. Schools will soon
resume and her pregnancy is becoming
older by the day. In no time people would
begin to notice. Kindly help me out.
Source: Nigerian Tribune
utter helplessness before in my adult
life. I have always been the stronger one
in our marriage and my husband always
left the decision making on issues to me.
Without prejudice, I always handled my
issues well but this present issue is too
much for me to handle.
My 16-year-old son has beaten more than
he could chew and you know the way it is
in the African set up; a good child is the
father’s, while the bad one belongs to the
mother. It has now become an issue of
“sort out the mess your son created”. This
for the past few weeks had been my
husband’s slogan, but when he came out
with distinction in his Senior Secondary
School Certificate Examinations (SSCE), he
was his proud father.
I really cannot say what pushed my son
into this, because I have always been
careful with all of them. I have four
children; three girls and a boy, who
happens to be our last child. He came as
an afterthought which explains why his
immediate elder sister is a lot older than
him; she is 23.
While the girls are away in school, he was
always home and got all the attention he
needed. Like the tradition in our family, he
had to stay in the boarding school in his
final year and that was the only time he left
the house and it was good for him because
he made all his papers.
When he left for school and I was left
alone at home, I asked one of my church
members, a widow who needed assistance
with her children’s education to allow one
of her girls to live with me. She gladly did, I
enrolled her in school, and took care of her
like my own child.
When my son returned home after his
examinations, they both relate like brother
and sister, and I personally do not see a
reason I shouldn’t let them play together.
Despite the fact that Grace, the little girl
who is 14 told me that her mother had
already spoken with her on sex education, I
made it a point of duty to do the same with
her. I didn’t bring her into my household
to treat her like an outsider, I took her as
my own daughter and I am really pleased
that she is well behaved.
Few weeks ago, I noticed that Grace was
looking very pale; I asked if she was ill and
she said she was feeling a little feverish. I
then took her to the hospital and it was
then that we were told she was six weeks
pregnant. I was shocked because she
doesn’t leave the house and she was
always with me. I kept my cool until we got
home; I couldn’t have done otherwise
because as soon as she heard the result of
her test, she started crying so hard that I
was scared.
As soon as we arrived home, she told me
my son was responsible. I was shocked. I
couldn’t ask him immediately as he was
away to his father’s office. When he came
in later and I asked him, he didn’t deny. I
didn’t know what I was expecting but his
confession shocked me to my bone marrow.
When I succeeded in calming Grace down, I
assured her that I would take care of the
situation, but sincerely I didn’t know how I
would handle it.
When my husband came, I told him all that
happened; his response shocked me. He
told me to handle it and clean my son’s
mess. I am still at a loss for a solution. I
did not take Grace from her mother to
truncate her education. I also do not have
the heart to send her back to her mother or
get her to have an abortion like people
have suggested. What if she is my
daughter? How would I tell her mother
what happened?
As for my son, I would treat him the way he
should be treated after sorting Grace out.
Please, Taiwo help me as I am really
confused and at a loss. Schools will soon
resume and her pregnancy is becoming
older by the day. In no time people would
begin to notice. Kindly help me out.
Source: Nigerian Tribune
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